2014 - Day 13 - Third USA Trip - WTF Colonel Sanders?

Today we left Las Vegas and headed for Palm Springs.  The Bear has visited there before however it would be a first for me.    We decided that rather than sticking to the Interstate routes, we would turnoff at Barstow in the middle of the Mojave Desert and take the back highway through.  We figured that maybe by taking the back highway that there might be some new, and exciting *rolls eyes* things to look at which is of course appreciated by Ms Shutterbug International. 
 

Before we got as far as Barstow I wanted to stop at Baker to see 2 things – the world’s tallest thermometer and some place that promoted the worlds best “alien jerky”.  I mean what was the go with that?  Was it something green and chewy?  Was it carved up little green men?  In any case we achieved both.  I stood beside the world’s tallest thermometer (seriously I am not sure why I bothered) and saw the place that promoted the world’s best alien jerky.  I didn’t go inside to see what the heck it was because we were running short of time, and I had decided that I wanted to be left with my own imagination as to what it was.  I felt that was going to be way more exciting than the reality.
 

Turning off at Barstow we embarked on a road that we had never travelled before.    As for finding new scenery and things to photograph, holy bloody hell.   This was worse than the Mojave Desert and this was just butt ugly.  I mean FFS we could not even play “I spy”.  We would have had one go each and that would have been it!  I spy with my little eye, something beginning with “r”.  Rock and road.  That was it.  We would not have even been able to come up with another letter!  And trying to make pictures out of clouds?  What clouds?    After a hundred miles of driving yet another long, straight road we actually came across a fence.  To say that I was excited because we saw a fence is an understatement.  That was until I had a complete mind f**k trying to figure out what a large paddock of rock would need a fence for.
 

I will say this though….I managed to capture a photograph of tumbleweed.  This is something that I have been trying to obtain since our first trip over here, and at last on my fourth trip, I get it.  The simple things eh?  Some would like to photograph the Eiffel Tower.  Me…..a large bunch of desert crap blowing across a road.  I was a little surprised at the noise it made as we hit it and have no doubt at all that a larger amount could do damage to a vehicle.
 

Travelling further along the LONGEST AND MOST F**KING BORING ROAD IN THE WHOLE UNIVERSE despite me having my camera poised at ALL times, I managed to miss out of taking a photo of the sign indicating a turnoff ahead to the Joshua Tree National Park.  I waited, and waited, and waited for another sign but it was not too come.   Not only was I extremely pissed at missing out on a photo of this sign, I wondered WTF Bono and U2 were thinking when they named an album after this horrendous countryside! The mere fact that we had come close to it was a little bit of an excitement for me (hence my desire for the photo), however this being said, James Spader could have walked out on the road at this point of the trip and I would have just yelled to get out of the way so that we could get to where we were going.
 

Finally we stumbled across the town of “Yukka”.  We were allegedly within an hour of Palm Springs but we were thirsty and hungry and in desperate need of a pee and some fuel.  We pulled into a gas station that doubled as a subway so it seemed like all of our prayers were answered.  Hmmmm…..not so much.  We were able to get fuel and were able to get a drink, and were even able to use a fairly grotty toilet, but the line up at Subway was long and was clear that it contained all residents of the states mental institution.  Not that there is anything wrong with that, but we needed to be on our way in a hurry, and I preferred not to witness having someone pick their nose and have it rubbed on me for luck.  *vomits*
 

We decided that we would wait until we got to Palm Springs for something to eat however a KFC made a rare appearance.  I saw harp playing cherubs and lolly pink unicorns. We had struck pay dirt. However….*sigh*….I am fairly sure that if there is a God he was playing a very big game of payback given my lifetime of non-believing and blasphemy.  The first thing we notice about the KFC is that it doesn’t sell hot chips.  I mean absolutely no hot chips. WHICH KFC DOES NOT SELL HOT CHIPS?????  Their biggest selling item (other than chicken of course) with the seriously yummy seasoning! Double checking we found that this was indeed the same KFC we have….you know…..Colonel Sanders joint.  That is completely and utterly in sane.    We review the menu and the Bear decides he will have some sort of a chicken burger (called a sandwich over here).  I decided I will have some crispy chicken strips because not much else looks like we have on our own menu at home, and I am still pissed about the lack-of-chips situation. 
 

Going through the drive-thru, the Bear has to repeat the order multiple times as we do in every drive-thru here.  That’s ok.  We’re used to that.  However, he is told that there are no chicken burgers….I mean sandwiches.  In fact, he is advised that they are sold out of every sort of “sandwich” on their menu.  I looked at the clock and it was only 1pm.  What the???  What KFC restaurant or any other takeaway outlet for that matter sells out of their product by 1pm?????  Defeated he just orders an apple turnover (he actually said apple pie to start off with which absolutely bamboozled the attendant.  I was more bamboozled by the fact that they sold apple turnovers at KFC and not bloody chips!!!) and a larger serve of crispy chicken strips to share.
 

Back out on the road we are on our last leg before Palm Springs.  The crispy chicken strips are barely edible and are very peppery, but at least they are food.  I placed down my camera in order to be able to eat, and of course, what should happen?  Another friggin’ sign for the Joshua Tree National Park.  I threw my chicken tender and grabbed for my camera, but of course I missed it.  Just shoot me. 
 

The view out the window coming into Palm Springs was again ugly yet fascinating at the same time.  Enormously huge windmills were in their hundreds if not thousands providing America with some of its electricity source.  I haven’t the faintest idea why Australia is not following suit.  The Americans are at least using their vast spaces and natural resources to help provide necessary utilities to its residents.  The landscape itself had changed from rocky to something yet again.  I cannot quite find the right words for what I could see, but “puckered, brown mountains” is the closest I can come to.
 

The suburbs of Palm Springs such as Palm Desert and Cathedral City are stunning.  They are very green and lush, with plentiful bougainvillea and of course palm trees. The down town district of Palm Springs is older than its outer suburbs so is by no means as modern however the main street is full of a variety of very nice restaurants of every ethnicity.  It actually makes the area seem like a combination of both yuppy and quaint.  However it was the presence of Christmas lights (yes….already) that gave the main street an extra bit of ambience and warm glow.  Interestingly though Palm Springs does not have street lights.  There are some dim ones at major intersections, but that is it.  Along the roadways, even the major ones, there are simply no street lights at all.  I have no idea how people can walk/jog after dark as there would seem to be a major safety issue here.  We even had trouble finding the driveway to our hotel because the area is simply too dark!
 

So Palm Springs has been seen and done.  Tomorrow morning we head back to L.A where we will board the Island Princess for our Panama Canal cruise. This is a new experience for both me and the Bear.  Excited much?  You bet!