2014 - Day 17 - Third USA Trip - Sale? What sale?

Today is our first of nearly four without land.    It is a loooooooong way from Cabo San Lucas, Mexico to San Juan Del Sur, Nicaragua.  I am dismayed to find that an awful lot of toilets on board are failing (around 3 out of every 4) and I can only assume it’s due to the oldies trying to flush their “Depends” down.  For those that are aware of my own health issues……this is not good news!

The Pacific Ocean is a beautiful blue, almost a light turquoise.  Light reflects somehow underneath the water giving a sun ray effect from below the surface.  It truly is pretty and unfortunately cannot be captured by my camera.  Heaven knows that I tried.  The sea breeze is very warm and I find myself wondering what the weather will be like as we make our way further south.  If it is anything like it was in Cabo, it will be horrendous.

It appears that every time we leave a port, the ship is going to have a “Sail Away Party” on deck 15.  Am not quite sure why they would go to all of this trouble for 2 Octogenarians and a stray seagull but hey, our big bucks had to have paid for something a little more than a gay boy band and some lady boys (and no….I still haven’t worked it out).  However they can save and double up on the music by playing the William Tell Overture at both the “Sail Away Parties” and the mornings opening of the buffet.

I had a bit of a dummy spit on the ship today (and I know that will come as a surprise to all of you.  NOT!) when I found out about a rort on the ship.  Given that it was an “At Sea” day, they decided to have a $10 sale.  El cheapo watches, purses, belts and hats were all being sold at the “bargain” price of $10.    Whilst everything else in there would clearly have fallen apart after one use, I still purchased a large floppy hat given that I had experienced the sun in Mexico, and it was so bloody hot.   I fought with the old biddies that felt that they had rights to a bargain before I did, but I tell ya…..I gave as good as I got.  I am learning quickly with these old ducks!  Mind you, one of them kept dropping their guts however I am sure that this was a strategic (and very effective) move.  I might have done the same and cleared the room however I wouldn’t have done that to my husband, nor could have bragged about it to my Mum. 

Anyway, taking my purchase I walked out of the “sale” and into the adjoining shop which sells souvenirs, some apparel and odds and ends. This is the same store from which the sale items originated from.  I was interested in seeing the items that we not on sale.  Upon entering, the Bear gestured to me to come closer to where he was and was holding up the same hat which I had just bought next door in the “sale”.  He held up the price tag on this hat.  It had a price tag of $6.99 on it.   I picked up another……and it was the same….and so on, and so on.

*brain explosion*

I grab the $6.99 hat and march up to the counter.  When asked “Mee I heeelp yaw” by the Latino behind the desk my response of “BLOODY OATH!!” was met with a quizzical look.  In fact she looked a little like my Prudence (for those of you who live under a rock and don’t know who my Prudence is, she is one of the loves of my life – one of my fur babies) does when she is listening to me.  Holding the $6.99 hat in one hand and the $10 “sale” hat in the other, I proceeded to demand an explanation as to which universe I was sailing in…..because the one that I actually lived in, would have promoted the $6.99 sale item hat as the actual SALE item….in the SALE!  Not INCREASE the price of the hat so that it came up to “one price fits all” at a $10 sale.  Now I am fairly sure that there is no Trade Practice Act that governs international waters so I came up with the most hurtful and below the belt 3 words I could muster – “this is low”.    After the fact of course I could come up with a zillion 3 word lines not only for this instance, but for other times. 

 

Here are a couple just for information sake:

 

*   Princess Cruises Suck

*   Old People Suck

*   Sale price moron!

*   What the f**k??

*   Clean your teeth!

*   F**K who smells?!!!!!!

*   Change your pants!!!

*   Who farted now?

*   Why fart here?

*   Why shit here?

*   Purple rinse set

*   LET ME OFF!!!

*   More alcohol stat!

*   Are you serious?

*   You ARE serious?

*   Kill me now!

*   Please kill me!

*   Kill me please!

*   Back off Boris!

*   Back off Bessie!

*   Just BACK OFF!

*   Alllll righty then!

*   Nap time already?

*   Oil those wheels!!!!!

*   Take a bath!!!!!

*   Deodorant.  Use deodorant!

*   Again, who farted?????

 

I could go on and on.  *sigh*   Just for the record, I did receive a $3.01 refund for catching them out.  Only small dollars but a HUGE principle!

Tonight on board we did see a very, very funny impressionist from Las Vegas.  He was a Jason Statham look alike, and used his 30 minute time slot well.  I am not sure that the oldies got anyone other than his impression of Johnny Carson however we liked him enough to want to look him up should we ever return to Vegas.  That is….if we survive this cruise.